Mulled wine..

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Major_Tom
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Mulled wine..

Post by Major_Tom »

..its great! I'm totally spangled. Here is my recipe if you would also like to be totally spangled.

you will need:
a bottle of wine. although I prefer a box just to be sure..
A litre of smooth no bits liquid lovely tescos finest juice d'orange..
a nice sweet red apple, similar to one offered to a gullible princess by a jealous witch..
a bag of soft, brown sugar..
star anise..
cinnamon sticks, or powder..
nutmeg..
cloves..

Pour forth a gush of orange juice. a mighty gush. you want half a litre of juice d'orange to a litre of wine, roughly, says ol' Tommy. then put in lots of wine.
Skin the apple, cut him into segments and cast him into the tasty medicine.
Two heaped table spoons of brown shug, but beware, the heaping, cohesive properties of soft brown sugar can often create a heap metres high.
Then put in about 15 cloves of clove. a small mound in the middle of a dainty lady's hand should suffice.
thmen put in about 4 or 5 star anises.
three or four cinnamon sticks, in they go to join their friends. if you cannot find the cinnamon sticks, powder is good, but surprisingly little is needed.
and a sprinkling if nutmeg. just a spring cling. it is the strongest bruiser in the lineup.

Slowly brew the pan up to a steamy heat. no more than a steamy heat mind! I like to put a plate the right way up on the pan so the alcohol does not escape and drips right back in.
if it doesnt taste right, simply add more of your favourite ingredients! Then drink it all. Brandy can be added, but you certainly wont be able to tell anyone about that if you do it as you will be totally smashed 🖤
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Re: Mulled wine..

Post by Mc Tool »

When I was a kid there was an old guy from Yorkshire and he told stories about making cider and refered to 2, 3, or 4 day ciders ,which I assumed had something to do with fermenting times , but no , thats how many days you went missing for after a session .
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Major_Tom
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Re: Mulled wine..

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Mc Tool wrote: Sat Jan 30, 2021 8:29 pm When I was a kid there was an old guy from Yorkshire and he told stories about making cider and refered to 2, 3, or 4 day ciders ,which I assumed had something to do with fermenting times , but no , thats how many days you went missing for after a session .
Funnily enough I have been making cider this year. Finally got drunk on them just before christmas and it was a mental drunk, your mind was ok but your body was comprehensively fucked. You could talk and think perfectly normally, but any movement was a disaster, even holding a pint was a disaster, I was gleefully laughing at my mates falling over and dropping their pints, then mine was just on the floor as well. A very interesting drunkenness which needs more scrutiny 👍
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Re: Mulled wine..

Post by mjcapri »

In my last year of Uni I shared a flat with a Spanish girl. Her friends were coming over one evening so I made (a large quantity of) sangria. Me being me I used a 14% Malbec and rather over did it with the Bacardi.... The result was that I got to spend the evening with five thoroughly inebriated senoritas, which made the hangover worthwhile!
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Re: Mulled wine..

Post by andyd »

As I was born and grew up in Somerset we had a local farm which made cider. Dad was never a big drinker and I don't recall him drinking cider but he did have a 5/10 gallon barrel in the late 70's which must have been for that purpose :?

In the late 80s and early 90s occasionally I would buy a gallon of half and half for £3.50, flat as a witches tit and pretty lethal :D

I took some to a 21st birthday party in Kent, and handed it around convincing the Strongbow drinkers that this was better :sneaky: Needless to say quite a few were literaly legless :lol:
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Re: Mulled wine..

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I do have a video somewhere of the damage our cider does to the human mind.. if I can find it..
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Re: Mulled wine..

Post by Mc Tool »

Major_Tom wrote: Wed Feb 03, 2021 3:06 pm I do have a video somewhere of the damage our cider does to the human mind.. if I can find it..
Ha ha ha ,ya wally ,just crack a few bottles and make another video .... Geeze Tom , talk about missed opportunities 😂
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Re: Mulled wine..

Post by Major_Tom »

Mc Tool wrote: Wed Feb 03, 2021 5:40 pm
Major_Tom wrote: Wed Feb 03, 2021 3:06 pm I do have a video somewhere of the damage our cider does to the human mind.. if I can find it..
Ha ha ha ,ya wally ,just crack a few bottles and make another video .... Geeze Tom , talk about missed opportunities 😂
Found the evidence. This is the boss trying to make a quick speech about cider making.

https://youtu.be/Th8WFxtElAo
I'm the one who leaves all those shoes in the carriageway.
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